One of the most important guidelines I give clients in mediation is to always have a concrete offer on the table—something the other party can consider after mediation. The fear and anxiety inherent in conflict makes it unlikely that adversaries will reach consent in one sitting. Triggers derail our reasoning. This is true in any conflict, but particularly in family divisions. So it's critical to make a clear and concise offer as soon as you can and then allow time to take ef

In addition to a judgment of divorce, the court can issue an order that divides retirement assets. A Qualified Domestic Relations Order,...

Retirement assets are marital property. It will almost always be 50-50%. If one party has a retirement asset and the other doesn’t, then the divorce law in New York says it should be divided by the “Majuaskas formula”, i.e. a ratio equal to the years the marriage lasted (the denominator) and the years of employment lasted (the numerator). Let’s say wife starts a job in 1985, gets married in 1990, and gets divorced in 2005. The husband is entitled to half of the retirement e

I reconnected with a friend from college and she told me she’s a divorce therapist, then she said, “I’m a discernment counselor, have you...